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The Final Speed Bump

QIC: Speed Bump

Date: 06/27/2019

PAX: Prosciutto, Funny Bone, Blindside, hobo, Sunburn, Angus, Sunshine, Red Tees, Sidekick, Dirk, Back Pew, Laces Out, Chief, Otis, Candu, Bookworm (Willy Loman), Skitch, Iron Butt

AO: Hill City

Conditions

Due to Speed Bump’s moving arrangements and other activities related therein, the remaining content will be purposely left blank until -or- unless Speed Bump finds time to complete this . So long, my friend.

-Prosciutto

COP

The Thang

COT

Moleskin

Speed Bump moving to Asheville, NC

News

Recent Backblasts

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    Ring around the Mosey

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 03/18/2019
    PAX: Jabooti, Fast Lane, Best in Show, Early Bird
    AO: Beast Ridge

    Beautiful, crisp Monday morning.

    I am not a professional, we will help you if you get hurt!

    COP

    Moseyed over to the field for several warm up exercises (some repeated).

    1. Side Straddle Hops IC
    2. Good Mornings IC
    3. Abe Begota IC
    4. Plank IC
    5. Step Ups IC
    6. Squats IC
    7. Lunges IC

    The Thang

    We attacked the track with the intent of doing a full lap, stopping every .5 mile to do a circuit of exercises: 

    1. 10 Merkins
    2. 10 Squats
    3. 10 Lunges (each leg)
    4. 10 American Hammers
    5. 10 Burpees
    6. 10 Michael Phelps

    On our second circuit, we upped the number on all exercises to 15 (except burpees). Continued our mosey. After the second round, we realized we needed to start running back to the parking lot so as to not go over. 
    Once back at the parking lot, we repeated our circuit one more time for good measure. 

    COT

    I shared with the group about a sermon I heard at church over the weekend on anger and its effects on us. Mostly wanted to communicate that when our anger turns to rage against one another, it can dehumanize us and the other person in that moment. Let’s be slow to anger and quick to love. 

    Moleskin

    Jabooti was a great help to EB in finishing the workout. Definitely a strong encourager. We missed some of the other regulars, and made fun of the punks out on a ski trip in Utah. 

    News

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    Stop and give me…a circuit of exercises

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 01/29/2019
    PAX: Care Bear, Dirk, Fabio, Goose, Free Candy, Iron Butt, Prosciutto, Ringwald, Sunshine, Sunburn, Skitch, The Count, VSquared, Venus
    AO: Hill City

    Wet rain that turned into small flurries. “Snowflaking” as the Pax called it.
    The Disclaimer was probably disclaimed.

    COP

    Mosey down to the Great Hall, complete the following exercises: 

      • Side Straddle Hops IC
      • High Knees IC
      • Side squats IC
      • Finkle Swings IC
      • Side Straddle Hops IC
      • Slow and Steady Squats IC
      • Plank IC
      • Mountain Climbers IC
      • Alternating Shoulder Taps IC
      • Wall sits IC
    • Side Straddle Hops (ascending and descending pace, IC)

    The Thang

      1. Extended mosey over to Mt. Medoriama, pausing every so often to do a circuit of exercises (completed 3X throughout the workout).
          1. 10 Merkins
          1. 15 Slow and Steady Squats
          1. 20 Big Boy Situps
        1. 15 Alabama Ass Kickers (each leg)
      1. Arrive at Mt. Medoriama, proceed to partner up and DORA
        1. 50 Burpees – partner one Bernie Sanders up to cone, partner 2 completes Burpees. On second time through, partners will Bernie Sanders up the whole hill. 
      1. Quick jog over to Boob Hill
        1. 80+ Ryan Lochtes – partner one runs fast around Boob Hill, partner 2 completes Ryan Lochtes
    1. Quick jog back to the great hall, completed the wall of pain:
        1. Wall Sit for 60 seconds, completing shoulder press and cherry pickers to distract from the pain
        1. Wall plank for 30 seconds
      1. Funky Fissure exercise with the wall, 60 seconds (alternating knee drives)

    Cool down mosey back to the Blue Rhino (stopped along the way for 10 penalty Burpees, no flag). The following MARY was completed:

    1. Flutter Kicks IC
    2. American Hammers IC
    3. Freddie Mercurys IC
    4. LBCs IC
    5. Pickle Pounders IC

    COT

    A couple of weeks ago, I was asked to write some words of encouragement for my best friend as he steps into pastoral ministry. My words, along with several others, would be read to him as an encouragement to him in this season. Think of that – a whole bunch of people writing specific examples of how we have been impacted by this guy. That’s powerful! How often do we tell each other these kinds of things? Not publicly, so we can get praise for being so encouraging, but privately, through the written word, so that they will hear us clearly. I rarely do this!
    Today, think of someone who has impacted you in the last few months, someone who encouraged you when you were down, or challenged you when you needed a boost. Write them a real, handwritten note, pop it in the mail, and then, most importantly, don’t sit around waiting for a response or for them to tell you about how meaningful that note is to them. Do it as a selfless act of encouragement.

    Moleskin

    When the rain turned to flurries, “Its snowflaking!” was exclaimed to sufficient chuckling. 
    QIC takes special pride when mumble chatter is low, as that means that PAX are sufficiently gassed (or that he is boring).

    News

    Don’t forget about the Road Trip to Canton this Saturday. Contact Sidekick on Slack for more details. 
     

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    Theology of Suck

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 12/11/2018
    PAX: Candu, Early Bird, FNG-Roadhouse (Respect), Iron Butt (respect respect), Jabooti, Laces Out (respect), Ohms, Picasso, Peanuts, Prosciutto, Ringwald, Skitch, Sunshine, The Count (respect respect), Vila, VSquared, Whittler
    AO: Hill City
    Conditions: cold, black ice everywhere
    The Disclaimer was properly disclaimed

    COP

    Mosey down to the Great Hall for warm up, do a lap around the stage: 

      • Side Straddle Hops
      • High Knees
      • Side squats
      • Finkle Swings
      • Side Straddle Hops
      • Good Mornings
      • Plank
      • Plank jacks
      • Wall sits + shoulder press
      • Wall sits + cherry pickers
    • Side Straddle Hops

    The Thang

    “Cardio builds bodio.” This workout is going to be tough, and I don’t want us to stop unless I say “STOP”. We will get time to rest in between sets.

      1. I’ve set up a ladder of 5 cones, we will run the ladder together: jog to first cone, sprint to next cone, jog to next cone, and sprint to last cone.
        1. At the end of the first ladder, we will complete the following circuit. 
            1. 60 Squats IC
            1. 20 Lunges (each leg) IC
            1. 10 eight count body builders OYO
          1. 20 Big Boy Sit Ups IC
      1. Mosey over to the next set of cardio sprints is the T Test (team competition), number off into two groups. First group to win gets one happy hour beer on me! 
        1. Each member of the PAX will complete the T Test until all of us have done it 10 times. At the end of this round, we will complete the following circuit:
            1. 20 Jump Squats
            1. 20 Reverse Lunges (each leg)
            1. 20 Diamond Merkins
          1. 15 Ryan Lochte
    1. Back to the cones of pain, jog, sprint, jog, sprint. Short rest, and repeat. 
    2. Slow mosey back to the Blue Rhino for some quick mary

    MARY:

      • American Hammers IC
      • Flutter Kicks
      • Freddy Mercury IC
    • LBCs IC

    COT

    COT: I read Picasso’s backblast called “Embrace the Suck.” I have to be honest, a lot around me is sucking right now. One thing I really appreciate about Christianity is its “Theology of Suck.” Christianity owns the fact that life will often suck, and promises a big God and personal Savior in the midst of that suck. I’m clinging to this promise, found in Matthew 16: 24-27 “24 Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25 For whoever would save his life[g]will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. 26 For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? 27”

    Moleskin

    There was much mumble chatter, particularly from Jabooti, who was really excited and eager to motivate everyone else to do better. His motivational voice rang across the icy paths.
    The PAX requested a re-naming of “Michael Phelps” (YHC’s version) to “Ryan Lochte.” Motion, second, passed. Makes more sense anyway, as Ryan Lochte kind of belongs face down on the pavement.
    FNG (“Roadhouse”) brought possibly the best answer to “How did you meet your wife?” Make sure you ask him sometime.

    Upcoming Qs

    Lion’s Den (12/12) – Mr. Clean
    Hill City (12/13) – Prosciutto
    The Batter (12/15) – The Count
    Landfill (12/15) – Free Candy
     

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    Wet and…something?

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 12/01/2018
    PAX: Cowbell, Free Weekly, Speed Bump, Venus, VSquared
    AO: Landfill

    Very wet, very soggy

    I’m not a professional, modify as necessary

    COP (extended warm up)

      • Side shuttle hops IC
      • Side squats IC
      • Good mornings IC
      • Wall Sits IC
      • Imperial Walkers IC
      • Finkle Swings, partner up and do 15 each leg
      • Side shuttle hops IC
      • Little baby arm circles IC (reverse and repeat)
      • Plank IC 
      • Plank jacks IC 
      • Alabama Ass Kickers IC
      • High Knees IC
    • Side Straddle Hops IC

    The Thang

    Lots of modification, as it was raining profusely (making the Q’s original workout plan virtually unusable). 
    Mosey down to the lower pavilion

    1. Complete 50 squats IC, lunges IC
    2. Begin a “dora” for the group since we have an odd number. Two different exercises:
      1. 300 collective LBCs, one group stays at the lower pavilion while the other group runs up to the higher pavilion and back.
      2. 300 collective pull ups. One group runs while the other group completes pull ups (either version). The pax were sufficiently gassed by this second dora, especially YHC who never does pull ups.
    3. 8 minute circuit with four exercises:
      1. 10 Monkey Humpers IC, 15 on the second go round
      2. 10 Merkins, 15 on the second go round
      3. 15 Big Boy Situps, 20 on the second go round
      4. 10 Michael Phelps, 15 on the second go round
    4. As the rain had sufficiently subsided, the PAX moseyed down to the very bottom of the walking trail near the dog park, stopped at intervals for Side Straddle Hops
      1. Interval sprints all the way up the hill to the bathroom building.
    5. Mosey back down to the lower pavilion for some simple Mary
      1. American Hammers IC
      2. Flutter Kicks IC
      3. Freddy Mercury IC

    COT

    Read James 1: 2-3. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds,3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
    I described the past season of life for me and the difficulty of counting suffering as joy. BUT, I love that in this passage in the Bible, the end is not perfection in body, mind, soul, or spirit, but a mature and complete faith.

    Moleskin

    We were grateful for Venus’ knowledge of Gym workouts, as we needed to assist one another on Pull Ups. Also, Free Weekly commented on the hilarity of doing Wall Sits IC, as F3 Asheville would never do something so foolish. 

    Upcoming Qs

    See weekly Preblast from Prosciutto 
     

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    Cold Tracks

     

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 11/12/18
    PAX: Fast Lane, Peanuts, Sidekick
    AO: Beast Ridge

    Very wet, chill in the air

    Welcome to F3. I am not a professional, you are here of your own will, modify as necessary. If you get hurt, we will get you back to your car.

    COP

    • Side Straddle Hops IC
    • High Knees IC
    • Side squats IC
    • Finkle Swing IC
    • Side Straddle Hops IC
    • Good Mornings IC
    • Side Straddle Hops

    The Thang

    The PAX completed one full lap around the park, with stops every .5 mile. At each stop, the PAX completed the following exercises:

    • Burpees, Squats, Michael Phelps, LBCs, Diamond Merkins

    Total counts for each exercise by the end:

    • Burpees = 55, Squats = 150, Michael Phelps = 100, LBCs = 150, Diamond Merkins = 60

    COT

    It was a cold, wet morning. Tough to show up to F3 when you know you are going to be laying in the mush at 5:30AM. I have been thinking a lot about showing up with my church, which just celebrated 10 years this past weekend. During our celebration, we asked the people who had been there from the beginning to stand up. As they stood up, I thought about all of the crap they have gone through; changing locations, money struggles, building community, etc. And they kept showing up. 
    My challenge to us is to keep showing up. Keep pursuing friendship, keep loving our families, keep digging in with our wives, and keep coming to F3. 

    Moleskin

    The PAX was exceptionally quiet, which signified to the Q that the workout was the appropriate level of hard. 

    Upcoming Qs

    Cleveland launch, November 17. 
     

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    “Track” City

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 11/1/2018
    PAX: Candu, Fabio, Free Candy, Moondance, Picasso, Ringwald, Snookie, Speed Bump, Sunshine, Threeskin, VSquared, Whittler
    AO: Hill City

    60 degrees, extremely pleasant

    It’s 5:30am, I’m not a professional, modify as necessary, and know that we are all out here to get better.

    COP

    Warm up lap around the concrete “track” (entire sidewalk that encompasses both large fields of Coolidge Park). The PAX completed the following exercises at various stops along the way.

    • Alabama Ass Kickers
    • High Knees
    • Side squats
    • Side Straddle Hops
    • Good Mornings
    • Squats
    • Side Straddle Hops

    The Thang

    YHC had a mind to have several stations and a team oriented Q. 
    The PAX split up into even teams, with the goal of getting through all activities in the quickest time possible. There were three stations:

    1. Station One
      1. 50 Big Boy Situps
      2. 40 Jump Squats
      3. 3 Suicide Sprints
    2. Station Two
      1. Merkin “Mile” around the loop. Every time you see a cone, you have to do 10 pushups.
    3. The T
      1. Each Team Member must complete the T at least 5 times while other members work to complete at least 60 burpees as a team. 

    As the PAX completed a station, they continued on to the next station until all three were complete. The first time around, Team 1 was a controversial victor (Team 2 struggled to understand YHC’s poorly written directions). On the second abbreviated round, Team 2 emerged victorious.
    The PAX finished off a tough workout with some MARY:

    • Xs and Os IC
    • 6”s IC

    COT

    Teamwork → as is obvious, you couldn’t do today with your team. It was hard, and some of you struggled more than others. That’s okay! We need each other, and encouraging words go far. I have a hard time believing that I need others to walk through life. Recognize today that you need people and that’s an essential part of being human. Don’t deny it, embrace it.

    Moleskin

    All PAX enjoyed some well-deserved Krispy Kreme donuts after the days workout. Mumble chatter was strong, especially as teams got more and more competitive. 

     

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    Four Corners

     

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 10/24/2018
    PAX: Fast Lane, Flemish, High Tops, Jabooti, Peanuts, Sidekick, Speed Bump
    AO: Beast Ridge

    Clear, cold with wet grass

    It’s 5:30am and welcome to F3. I am not a professional, you are here of your own will, modify as necessary. If you get hurt, we will get you back to your car.

    COP

    The PAX moseyed around the concrete loop a ways, completed several warm up exercises at various intervals: 

    • Alabama Ass Kickers
    • High Knees
    • Side squats
    • Side Straddle Hops
    • Good Mornings
    • Plank
    • Plank jacks
    • Side Straddle Hops

    The Thang

    Four Corners – goal is to use the whole field, including the hill near the parking lot and the bleachers. 

    1. Name of the game is four corners, with each corner of the soccer field representing a different exercise, with a short pause at the bleachers. Each exercise should be done in cadence unless otherwise stated.
      1. First corner →  Lunges, 10 each leg, 20 on second go round
      2. Second corner → Burpees, 10 OYO, 15 OYO on second go round
      3. Bleachers → Dips 25, incline merkins 15, Box Jumps 10 OYO; Dips 35, incline merkins 25, Box Jumps 20 OYO second time
      4. Third Corner → Squats, 20 in cadence, 30 on second go round
      5. Fourth Corner → Sprint across the field and back or monkey humpers x 15
      6. Bear Crawl up the hill, crab crawl down the hill (Bernie Sanders up and Jog down on second go round) 

    The Pax completed two full rounds of Four Corners, with a third shortened version at the end of the Thang.
    The following Mary exercises were then completed in the parking lot:

    • American Hammers IC
    • Michael Phelps IC
    • Xs and Os IC
    • 6”s IC
    • Freddy Mercury IC
    • LBCs IC
    • Big Boy situps IC

    COT

    Humility → in my marriage, I always want my wife to be the first one to say she is sorry after we fight. Leadership, though, seems to mean that I set forth an example of humility, being willing to take a dose of humble pie and acknowledge my error. Set that example today.  

    Moleskin

    The PAX complained to no end about their wet feet, and everyone loved the crab crawls down the hill. 

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    BLIMPS aren’t for WIMPS

     

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 09/18/2018
    PAX:
    AO: Hill City

    Cool, almost Fall like, <70 degrees

    It’s 5:30am and welcome to F3. I am not a professional, you are here of your own will (and we are glad), modify as necessary, if you get hurt, we will get you back to your car.

    COP

    Side Straddle Hops IC X15

    BROGA – Forward Fold – Pike – Up Dog – Plank – Right hand up –  Plank – Left hand up,

    Superman X3

    Left lean and Right Lean

    Seal Jacks IC x12

    3rd Grade exercises ICX12

    Mercans ICX12, SSH ICX15

    The Thang

    Mosey up to the bridge of death (a.k.a., the walking bridge)
    Start on Frazier side, intermittent stops to complete a whole BLIMPS circuit, alternating between Bernie Sanders and forward facing run. 

    • Burpee x 5
    • Lunge x 10 (each leg)
    • Imperial walker x 20 IC (start slow, halfway through speed up)
    • Slow Merkins x 10
    • 15 Plank Jacks
    • 20 Air Squats

    Upon completion of the first bridge run 30 Side Straddle Hops. Start on Ice Cream Show side, intermittent stops to complete a whole BLIMPS circuit, alternating between Bernie Sanders and forward facing run. 

    • Burpee x 10
    • Lunge x 10 (each leg)
    • Imperial walker x 40 IC (start slow, halfway through speed up)
    • Merkins x 20
    • 30 Plank Jacks
    • 40 Air Squats

    Mary:

    • Flutter kick circuit performed in cadence: 7 IC Seated Flutter Kicks with hands raised in Hallelujahs. Move immediately to hands behind you. 7 IC slightly reclined flutter kicks. Move immediately to 7 IC normal flutter kicks. Move immediately to 7 IC LBC Flutter kicks. Rinse and repeat as needed. The real crowd pleaser is to work your way down the cadence ladder 7,6,5…
    • American Hammers

    COT

    Today, your word of the day is honesty. This one is tough for me because I have grown up about as insecure as you could imagine. I lived behind lies from my earliest memories, and struggled to let people in by being honest with them. Start simple. If you are pumped about your job, tell your boss how grateful you are. If you are feeling weary, thin, beat down by the punches of daily life, tell your wife, tell your friend, tell a fellow F3 brother. If you are worried about what’s coming down the road, open up. If you can’t wait for what’s next, share so we can celebrate with you.
    Whether you believe it or not, we live in a culture that denigrates men who share with others. Understand that most guys out here, even, aren’t used to living in and around other men who are honest about what life is tossing at them today, this week, this year. Whether your life is full of joy or sorrow, talk about it, share it with the people around you.

    Moleskin

    The PAX LOVES running the bridge, especially Prosciutto.

    News

    Convergence on October 13 with Nashville F3. Mark your calendars!
     

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    Steady Eddie vs. Frantic Frank

     

    QIC: Speed Bump
    Date: 09/13/2018
    PAX: Best in Show, Care Bear, Fissure, Flow, FNG-The Cook, FNG-Two By, Goose, Jabooti, Laces Out, Moondance, Peanuts, Prosciutto, Ringwald, Sunshine, VSquared, Whittler
    AO: Hill City

    UUUUMMIIIIDDDD, and mildly warm.

    It’s 5:30am and welcome to F3. I am not a professional, you are here of your own will (and we are glad), modify as necessary, if you get hurt, we will get you back to your car.

    COP

    Mosey over to the Great Hall for some warm up. The Pax completed the following exercises for a thorough warm up.

    • Good mornings x 10 in cadence
    • Side shuttle hops x 20 in cadence
    • Finkle Swings, partner up and do 15 each leg
    • Side shuttle hops x 20 in cadence
    • Little baby arm circles x 20 in cadence (reverse and repeat)
    • Plank x 15 in cadence (stay up)
    • Plank jacks x 15 in cadence (stay up!)
    • Wall sit x 20 in cadence
    • Alabama Ass Kickers x 15 in cadence
    • Side shuttle hops x 20 in cadence

    Moseyed back to Mt. Medoriyama, immediately completed 20 Merkins in cadence.

    The Thang

    Q explained the theme of the day, “Steady Eddie vs. Frantic Frank.” If “Frank” is called out, all PAX must immediately complete 20 Side Shuttle Hops with speed.

    1. Partner exercises:  
      1. One partner does Michael Phelps while the other partner sprints up and moseys down Mt. Medoriyama. Goal is 140. Once a group is finished, they must run up and down Mt. Medoriyama until all PAX are done.
      2. Box jumps up the concrete steps while the other partner does lunges, go until you hit 200. 
      3. One partner does burpees, while the other partner runs around the smaller two hills. Stop when you hit 80. 

    The entire group of HIMs were utterly exhausted at the end of the Thang, having learned over the course of partner exercises to hate Frank and any utterance of his name.
    The PAX proceeded back to the Love Shack for 5 minutes of Mary, wherein Frank was called two more times, solidifying how awful Frank actually is.
    MARY:

    • Flutter Kicks
    • American Hammers
    • Freddy Mercury

    COT

    “Steady Eddie vs. Frantic Frank”. I have always been a Frantic Frank, struggling to keep myself from impatience, to put the same amount of effort into my work throughout the day, and to love the people around me no matter how they treat me. Steady Eddies are un phased by life’s circumstances, willing to ride out the ups and downs of life, while Frantic Franks are tossed about by their own emotions. As you can imagine, Steady Eddies are better leaders, husbands, community members, and friends, because they see life in full view, taking into account that some days require more patience, energy, care, etc., but each day requires the same attitude.  That’s what I love about James 1:2-3, “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.” Encourage a brother to be a Steady Eddie today, and encourage them towards peace when they get frantic.  

    Moleskin

    Jibouti and Proscuitto are to be commended for their dedication to finishing partner exercise two, and Whittler ought be complimented for his excellent Side Shuttle Hop form.

    News

    Convergence with Nashville coming soon. 

    Upcoming Qs

    9/18 – Wort
    9/20 – Kodak