The Shopkeeper and His Son Were A Different Story Altogether…

QIC:  WuzntMe

Date: 1/17/22

PAX: Ramrod, Full Moon, John Doe, WreckedEm (with a W), MIA, Bernie, Choo Choo

AO:Hacksaw


Conditions

Cold, frozen, and covered in ice and snow. However, you wouldn’t know from Ramrod’s insistence that it’s shorts weather.


COP

Various amounts of SSH and stretches. Plus some burpees. Unoriginal.


The Thang

Countdown to the Countdown:

13 of each:
Curls
Presses
Leg Lifts
BBS
Incline merkins
Decline merkins
Squats
Lunges

Do all 13, then when finished, do 12, then 11, so on. Everytime the timer goes off, 5 dips.

Q: Modification for dips?
A: Burpees.
Choo Choo: hellyeah. <proceeds to do burpees in weightvest while somewhere in the distance a bald eagle screams and freedom happens and we win the cold war again>

Pax “enjoyed” some stoner rock.


COT

Shared a story about how yesterday I was consumed with a task at hand, and almost missed an opportunity to pepper my M with snowballs. I am admittedly awful about getting focused on a task and forgetting to actually live in the moment. One day, after I will have spent the entirety of my life making plans, I will realize that I have burned through my youth and the only plan left is to die. Live in the moment, put aside your plans, and take the opportunities as they come.


Moleskin

Pretty sure that this is the first time the term “douchebag” has ever been used during formal prayer requests. Our apologies to the Almighty, but we are thankful for John Doe’s new adventure. Douchebag.

Full Moon forgot about Clutch. Vamanos, vamanos.

Ramrod voiced his displeasure that the PAXs’ Ms don’t respect classic drummers.

Most of the PAX have been through this particular workout before; MIA reminded me that this was unoriginal. I reminded him of the Hacksaw mission statement : World’s most unoriginal AO, where everything is likely to be better somewhere else.


News

Tuff Muff on 2/19
4th F Weekend in May


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    Rihanna Appreciation Day

    QIC:  WuzntMe

    Date: 05/21/2021

    PAX: Escobar, Uncle Joe, Top ‘Em, Zima, Toe Tag, Mayhem, 9Volt, El Chapo, Woodrider, Oui Oui, Seagull, AOL, Picabo, Point Break, Bernie

    AO: Hacksaw


    Conditions

    A nice, cool morning… for a regretful situation and a joke that went just a little too far.


    COP

    Took a lap around the church parking lot, then 33 SSH. Then got down to brass tacks. To the amazing musical poetry otherwise known as “Umbrella,” PAX were introduced to RiRi’s Appreciation Day. While Jay-Z prattles on about, well, whatever Jay-Z “raps” about, PAX did plank jacks. Every time RiRi mentions her rain-deflection device, pax did a burpee. Everytime she describes it as an “ella” or “aaaaay”, it’s a donkey kick. Every time our Bahamian princess mentions rain, PAX did a dive bomber.


    The Thang

    Pax counted off by fours. Then split into said groups.
    Group 1:
    Find Love in a Hill-less Place (run to the bottom of the Increased Gravity Zone, find the heart scrawled in chalk, turn around and run to the top of the not-hill)
    Group 2:
    S(quats) & M(erkins)– 10 squats, 20 Merkins. Focus on form. Repeat ad infinitum.
    Group 3:
    Rude Boys (gone get it up, I believe) – 10 BBS, 20 LBCs, 30 Flutters. Repeat.
    Group 4:
    Only Curls in the World– 10 shoulder presses, 20 curls, 10 dips. Repeat until pace group returns.

    Groups rotate once hill has been summitted by entirety of the group. Pax then offered another Rihanna fun fact, rinse, repeat x 8.

    Circle up.
    Shine Bright Like a…
    Everytime she says Diamond, do a diamond merkin. Song is much longer than you’d expect, and despite the vast lyrical talents of Katy Perry’s maid of honor, she repeats the word Diamond close to 40 times.


    COT

    Rihanna Appreciation Day started off as a joke between 9Volt and myself when he played one of her songs at his Q. But merely speaking that into existence turned into an actual thing, and then, well, it happened. What we choose to embrace in our lives is no different. What we praise, and likewise, defame, manifests itself into reality. If you complain about your wife, or your kids, or your job, you will grow to resent them. If you choose to praise, speak positively about them, etc., your love for them will grow. YHC challenged the boys to speak positively about their lives, and to manifest decency.


    Moleskin

    Of all Rihanna fun facts, PAX favorite was “Umbrella was her first hit, while ex-boyfriend Chris Brown’s biggest hit was, actually, Rihanna.” One pax, who will remain nameless, remarked, “Oh, now I know who she is!” insert BunkMorelandHeadshake.gif

    PAX were also astonished to learn that Rihanna didn’t graduate high school. Shocker, that.

    Oui Oui expressed disbelief that Rihanna cannot blink. He is still scouring the internet for proof that she can, in GIF form. Godspeed, soldier.

    Toe Tag had never heard the lyrics to S&M (“this might be pornography in song form, Wuz”), and we all felt a little ashamed for having played it in a church parking lot. Or for having played it at all, really.

    9Volt wears a pair of ‘shorts’ that, while an affront to American iconography, he gleefully admitted “used to be just underwear.” Mentors, ladies and gentlemen.


    News

    Memorial Day convergence. Mustaches mandatory, sleeves optional.


    Recent Backblasts

      Hacksaw Has No Hills; Therefore Terrible

      QIC:  WuzntMe

      Date: 3/4/2020

      PAX: Mayhem, Escobar, Meow Mix, Snow Patrol, John Doe, Jazzy Jag, Bernie, Fastlane, Vaccine, Clothespin

      AO: Hacksaw (Without Hills)


      Conditions

      Clear. Smooth like an ironing board.


      COP

      Mosey to the sheriff’s lot.

      20 SSH
      15 mountain climbers
      10 Teapots
      Downward Dog
      Upward Dog
      Third Grades


      The Thang

      Run to the not a hill .

      Since this isn’t a hill, it should be easy to Bearcrawl Boilermaker to the not a top.

      Once reaching the end of the street, which is somehow taller and at a significantly higher elevation than the rest of the vast plains of Hacksaw, indian run around the church.

      Go back down to the bottom of the hill.
      Partner up. One person bernies to the top. Other person does 5 BBS, 10 flutters, 15 mercuries, and 20 LBCs. Sprints to catch his partner up hill. Loser does 10 burpees, winner does LBCs until burpees finished. Swap chaser/pursuer, and do it again.


      COT

      There is no hill. Whatever obstacle you have, the bigger deal you make it, the more likely you are to lose. Don’t focus on the size of the problem, just conquer it.


      Moleskin

      John Doe is unimpressed with my mountain climbers.
      Pax really enjoyed the flat, boring, Kansas-like terrain of Hacksaw.


      News

      We need to support Battery with Qs and Pax for their impending Thursday launch. JD needs help with 3rd F.


      Recent Backblasts

        The Chase is Better Than the Catch

        QIC:  WuzntMe

        Date: 03/02/2020

        PAX: Sidekick, Fastlane, Peanuts, Chavez, Lanyard, Swisher, Swingset, Best in Show, Mayhem, Sparky, Home Alone

        AO: Beast Ridge


        Conditions

        Raining.


        COP

        Mosey to the long lot, before Fastlane’s love shack.

        20 SSH
        Downward Dog
        15 SSH
        Upward Dog
        10 SSH
        World’s Greatest Stretch
        5 burpees


        The Thang

        In Slack, I had mentioned that this was going to be a Motorhead Monday. So, in keeping with that theme, we started with Bomber.
        11s, featuring Dive Bombers and Dips.

        Count off by twos
        Continuing on our theme, The Chase is Better Than the Catch

        Pax 1: 5 BBS, 10 flutter kicks, 15 Mercuries, 20 LBCs
        Pax 2: Bernie across the lot, until they reach the end.
        Pax 1 completes exercise, then chases after Pax 2. If Pax 2 can get to the end before Pax 1 tags them they win. Else, they lose. Loser does 10 burpees, while winner does LBCs until burpees completed.
        Rinse and repeat x4


        COT

        Lemmy is right. The Chase is Better Than the Catch. In life, we get so consumed with completing something, that we often lose interest after we catch it. We do this in work, with our marriages, and with our children. I challenge the PAX to enjoy the process, to enjoy the pursuit, but to not *stop* pursuing. Pursue your wives. Pursue being a better father. Pursue being a better employee. Pursue something you can never quite catch, and never get complacent.


        Moleskin

        My bluetooth speaker sucks. Motorhead wasn’t nearly loud enough for all to enjoy.


        News

        – 3rd F – Tomorrow / Meet at Chubby’s BBQ at 5:30PM. Serve until 8ish.
        – check Announcements channel


        Recent Backblasts

          My Playlist has more than 4 songs!!!

          QIC:  The Count (Respect/Respect)

          Date: 03/28/2020

          PAX:  FNG-Amir Rehiem(Jordache), FNG-Jeremy Kennedy(Ruby), 9-Volt (Respect), Annie, Clothes Pin, Cold Play, Deep Dish, El Chapo (Respect), Escobar, Fast Lane, John Doe, Mayhem (Respect), Miss Baker (Respect), Peanuts, Runner Up, Snow Patrol, Swipe Right, Three Skin, Toe Tag, Vaccine, Wuzn’t Me

          AO:  Hacksaw


          Conditions

          37 degrees and dry


          COP

          PAX all circled in P/L by flag (Domino’s), Used 30 lb Sandbag and passed from one PAX to another counter clockwise (increasingly speeding up), after 2nd pass, reverse clockwise. Next, SSH (I/C 20). Mosey toward Memorial Park, around path and under street near PD P/L and Pavilion.


          The Thang

          HIIT meets Merkin Mania
          Under Pavilion using picnic tables and P/L (about 35 yards)
          PAX pair up and split up. First PAX go to Pavilion and Second PAX to P/L. First PAX performs 7 Merkin Exercises (using proper form) as quickly as possible 10 Reps each. 1)Merkin – 2)Incline Merkin – 3)Decline Merkin – 4)Diamond Merkin – 5)Werkin – 6)Ranger Merkin – 7)Chuck Norris Merkin. Second PAX in P/L is doing Bernie Sanders approximately 35 yards and quick Mosey back to start (Rinse and Repeat 3 times). Flip Flop with First PAX and Rinse and Repeat. When both PAX have completed Merkins and Bernie all PAX meet in P/L circle up. Slow Squat (I/C 20 Reps), Alternating Lunges (I/C 20 Reps). That Completes round 1. Rinse and Repeat for round 2 (Only change, add 10 Burpees. Round 3 move faster and do 5 Reps / 2 Bernie’s and add 10 more Burpees. Mosey back to Memorial Park and circle Flag Pole for Mary’s: 10 (I/C) of following Mary’s: LBC’s, American Hammer, Freddy Mercury’s, BBS, Heals To Heaven…. ENDEX


          COT

          Enjoyed a Good Pre F3 ruck of 5 miles with Clothes Pin and Mayhem. They were very happy to hear that I had planned an easy workout. I probably should have said it was easy to plan the workout. What a difference in the meaning changes just my moving a couple words… 🙂
          BALL OF MAN: Had several Prayer requests and a praise for a little boy who appears to be healed from cancer. We also want to find a match for the little guy Mayhem has been keeping us up to speed on. He needs a Bone Marrow match! PRAY PRAY PRAY


          Moleskin

          We welcome to the F3 Chattanooga and F3 Nation “Ruby” and “Jordache” Funniest comment came from “Jordache” (who by the way wore jeans to the workout). He said he thought it was going to be easy. I guess he was planning to go to work right afterwards since it was Friday and probably “Casual Day” he wasn’t going to shower… LOL. Also, when I asked him how he was feeling during some Bernie….He said, “I feel Nauseous”! Put a smile on my old man face!!


          News

          [Fill in News, Upcoming Q’s, Events, etc.]


          Recent Backblasts

            Cheer Up Charlie – With Burpees

            QIC: WuzntMe

            Date: 2/11/2020

            PAX: Topless, Mrs Baker, 9 Volt, DeepDish, Clothespin, El Chapo

            AO: The Battery


            Conditions

            Well, it’s the Battery, so, rain?


            COP

            Quick mosey to the Pavillion.
            30 SSH
            10 Teapots
            25 SSH
            10 World’s Greatest Stretch
            20 SSH
            10 Forward fold
            15 SSH
            10 LBAC, 10 Moroccan night club, 10 Don Quixotes
            10 SSH
            10 Willie Mays Hayes
            10 Burpees


            The Thang

            It’s raining. We’re staying under the pavilion. Grab a rock
            10 curls
            15 shoulder presses
            20 burpees
            Rinse/Repeat x3
            5 burpees as a cool down
            5 burpees again

            10 dips
            15 weighted situps
            20 burpees
            x 2

            10 burpees as cool down

            Freddy Mercuries x20
            LBCs x 20
            Heeltouches x 20
            Burpees x 10
            Consecos w/rock x10
            Hundreds x20
            Burpees x10
            Flutter Kicks until time.

            150 burpees per man.


            COT

            I had a terrible night with my daughter the night before. She pushed every button I had, and I didn’t respond like I ought to have. As a result, I was in a dour, uncomfortable mood on the way to the Battery. As soon as I got there, Chapo noticed I wasn’t “myself,” and asked me what was going on. He told me he had a crap night the day before, and still had a smile on his face. He was going to cheer up, as today was a new day. I needed that encouragement. In that moment, Chapo was able to speak some life to me.

            Speak life to someone else today. Let them know you care about them, and offer encouragement.

            Baker led us out.


            Moleskin

            Chapo and DeepDish kept calling for more burpees, so, more burpees were added.

            High probability my gloves are now just trash. <insert spinal tap reference>

            Mrs Baker led us out.


            News

            Lunch at Jenkins at 11:30 on Thursday

            CSAUP Tuff Muff on 2/22.
            Chapo’s birthday bash upcoming.


            Recent Backblasts

              Nolan Richardson was Honest

              QIC:  WuzntMe 

              Date: 1/22/20

              PAX: Toe tag, Peanuts, swiperight, vaccine, bernie, fastlane, MaYhem, clothespin,  snow patrol, coldplay, speed trap

              AO: Hacksaw


              Conditions

              Cold.


              COP

              Mosey to Sherriff’s Lot

              SSH x20
              5 burpees OYO
              SSH x 20
              Imperial Walkers x15
              SSH x20
              Forward Fold x10
              SSHx20
              Mountain Climbers x15
              SSH x20
              5 burpees OYO


              The Thang

              Grab a block and a partner for the Nolan Richardson


              50 Manmakers

              100 Abyss Merkins on block

              150 block shoulder presses

              200 lunges

              250 Flutter Kicks

              300 LBCs

              350 Shoulder taps

              Partner A runs lap around flags while partner B does exercises. Switch.

              COT

              The other day, my M told me I looked like crap. She said I looked like I needed rest, and insisted I fartsack on Tuesday morning. She was right. I’ve had a hellacious project wrap up, and my exhaustion showed.

              In that moment, my M was not nice, but she was honest. My brother once told me that being nice isn’t a virtue, but that being honest is. I challenge the Pax to surround themselves with people who can be honest with them, and to be honest with others when possible. As men, we tend to think that we should just keep working at something, when in actuality, we can be at risk of exhaustion. I needed to hear what my M had to share. Maybe someone needs to hear you.


              Moleskin

              Very little mumble chatter. When time was called, I did hear something along the lines of “oh thank God for small victories.” I’ll take it.

              Chamber music promised, chamber music delivered during Countarama.


              News

              Sale creek convergence 2/8. Looking to get a 2.0 campout scheduled for end of March.


              Recent Backblasts

                Escobar 1 Year of Gloom

                QIC:  Escobar

                Date: 01/10/2020

                PAX: Bernie, Anny, Toe Tag, Speed Trap, Snow Patrol, Deep Dish, 9volt, Mrs. Baker, John Doe, Clothespin, Mayhem, Peanuts, Vila, The Count, Ducktales, Chavez, WuzntMe, Moondance, Vaccine,  Money Ball, Cold Play, Red Tees, Fast Lane

                AO: Hacksaw


                Conditions

                Moon was only 99.8% Full, but the 56 degrees in Mid January made up for it.


                COP

                Warm up? 3 PAX rucked for 75 min and 6 other PAX ran a 5k before the start.

                Introduced the PAX to the Trinity of Titan 80lb sand bags. After disclaimer given, told PAX to grab and bag and Mosey. The Trinity of bags gave insight to the direction we were headed. Moseyed across Apison Pike, past police station down Swinyar Dr instructing PAX every 100 yards to swap out carrying the bags. Stopped halfway down Swinyar for 20 SSH, then continued to… HOLY HILL.


                The Thang

                Arrived at the bottom of Holy Hill where 10, or 11, or 12, definitely 12, cones were placed 15 yards apart traversing the hill. Set Trinity Bags off to the side for The Thang.

                Inspiration came from my first post, Deep Dish VQ on 1-12-2019. The road was our greenway and the cones were our light posts.

                Starting at first cone perform called exercise, run to next cone, perform same exercise decreasing by 1.

                Burpees: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 1, 1

                Arrived at top of HOLY HILL for 45 seconds of Crunchy Frogs.

                Let’s Go Down:

                Reverse Lunges (facing top of hill at each station): 20, 18, 16… 2, 2, 2

                Arrived at bottom for 45 seconds of Leg Lifts.

                Let’s Go Up:

                Monkey Humpers: 20, 18, 16… 2, 2, 2

                Arrived at top for 45 seconds of Reverse Crunches.

                Let’s Go Down:

                Decline Merkins: 20, 18, 16… 2, 2, 2 (20 felt great, 18 didn’t, and by 16 I regretted the number)

                Grabbed the Trinity and moseyed back to Domino’s parking lot (again calling for bag swap every 100 yards)

                Arrived at parking lot with 1 minute left and gave the PAX what they wanted, 1 minute of 100s.

                TIME (whew)


                COT

                COMMITMENT: After all the commitments we make as men (wife, children, friends, church, work, etc.) where do we take the time to commit to ourselves? These early morning workouts are a perfect time to commit to ourselves. No one else is awake and needing us in this moment. “But, I’m too tired.”-Me. I’ve learned that I get as much sleep now as before by going to bed just a little earlier. It’s easy to be ready for bed at 9:30 P.M. when you have been on the go since 4:30 A.M.

                ACCOUNTABILITY: “I don’t need accountability, I work out on my own.”-Me. I did go through a stretch (a month or two) where I did a decent job working out at home. But man that sure is boring. I did not push myself to the same level as when working out with others. I fartsacked far too many times. Even to this day, if I plan a 5 A.M. workout at home, I rarely make it out of bed. However, here at the hack, we have made 5 A.M. run club the standard before every workout. I haven’t missed any day that I planned on being there early.

                BROTHERHOOD: “I don’t need more friends, I don’t have enough time for my current friends. “-Me. 5:30 A.M. doesn’t take away from your current friends (heck invite them to join and then you will see your friends even more). But if we are being honest, you will forge relationships with the men around you. There is a bonding power between men, when we struggle together. Pushing each other, mumble chatter, and going through the suck of an early morning workout, will all bring you closer to the men around you.

                COMFORT ZONE: “I’ll never lead/Q” and “5:30 A.M., that is insane”-Me on both accounts. Now, I love the leading aspect. It challenges me in more ways that I would have imagined. You don’t want to be the guy whose workouts are, uhhhh… easy.


                Moleskin

                One goal/hope was for some Merlot Splashing to occur. It didn’t happen that I’m aware. However, at least 2 of the PAX (in shape fellers) complained of being lightheaded, so I’ll take that.

                Ducktales came to breakfast afterwards and ordered a trayfull of breakfast burritos… for himself. Vila also knows the ins and outs of the Chick-fil-A app better than you.

                Oh yeah, 2ndF at Heaven and Ale later the same day was awesome. 9volt has more style that you and Mrs. Baker saw a GMC Yukon go airborn.


                News

                Gloomies, OTB North GA on Saturdays at 7, Volunteer on the 3rdF channel to help with the weekly Tuesday gathering at Chubby’s BBQ.


                Recent Backblasts

                  BlockJack

                  QIC:  WuzntMe

                  Date: 1/7/2020

                  PAX: ElChapo, Toetag, Escobar, Clothespin, 9Volt, Mrs Baker, John Doe, Deep Dish

                  AO: Battery


                  Conditions

                  Pleasant enough.


                  COP

                  Mosey to the pool parking lot. Circle up.

                  SSH
                  World’s Greatest Stretch
                  Lewinskys
                  Plank Jacks
                  Mtn Climbers
                  Forward Fold
                  SSH
                  Merkin


                  The Thang

                  Grab a CMU from the previously hidden stack.

                  Blackjack – 1 curl, 20 shoulder presses. Five LBCs between curl and press, five flutters between press and curl. Change increments until 20 curls and 1 shoulder press.

                  Replace block.

                  Lunge across parking lot. and back.
                  20 toe merkins
                  Plank for one minute
                  Hundreds

                  Mosey back to the flags- Freddie Mercury until time.


                  COT

                  Thanked the PAX for accountability and camaraderie.


                  Moleskin

                  John Doe enjoys a nice Truly every once in a while…

                  Deep Dish is not impressed with our Illinois AOs…

                  5k5a is spreading.


                  News

                  Gloomies.


                  Recent Backblasts

                    Commitments > Resolutions

                    QIC:  WuzntMe, MoneyBall

                    Date: 01/01/2020

                    PAX: Skitch, Mrs. Baker, 9 Volt, Hasbro, U-turn, Sunburn, Toe Tag, Threeskin, El Chapo, Doodles, Vsquared, Bernie, Otis, Hector, Milkman, Proscuitto, Blindside, Peanuts, Best in Show, Ironbutt, Uncle Fester, Backpew, FNG – Roomba, Icy Hot, Pomade, Peebles, Clothespin, Escobar, Fissure, Radiohead, Jabooti, Friar Tuck, Rollback

                    AO: Lions Den


                    Conditions

                    Cold and clear


                    COP

                    MoneyBall led us on a tour of the Den, complete with burpees at each station


                    The Thang

                    7s on the Bleachers:
                    Dips at the bottom, Dive bombers on the top. Hold plank once flipped.

                    Battle of the Five Points
                    Count off by five
                    Five stations in the middle of the field – four cones, and one at the bench.
                    Group five runs a lap around the track, while the other groups perform the exercises written at the cones. Exercises were written in different numbers, and split between IC and OYO.

                    Group 1:
                    Squats
                    Carolina Dry Docks
                    Diamond Merkins
                    Hundreds
                    Mtn Climbers

                    Group 2:
                    Lunges
                    LBAC
                    Merkins
                    American Hammers
                    Plank leg lifts

                    Group 3
                    Bonnie Blairs
                    Chinooks
                    Wide Merkins
                    Hello Dollys
                    Plank Jacks

                    Group 4
                    High Knees
                    Military Presses
                    Diamond Merkins
                    Freddie Mercurys
                    Shoulder Taps


                    Once group 5 returns, everyone circles and does 5 burpees, then rotates to the next station. Repeat until all five revolutions have been made

                    Bear Crawl Boilermaker
                    line up in groups in single file line at the goal line. Last man bear crawls to the front. Repeat relay until time.


                    COT

                    Resolutions are weak. Commitments mean something, and can be measured, and have accountability. YHC proclaimed his commitment, and asked for accountability. Others shared theirs.

                    Blindside led us out.


                    Moleskin

                    WDEF was there to film…


                    News

                    [Fill in News, Upcoming Q’s, Events, etc.]


                    Recent Backblasts