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lil bit o dis lil bit o dat

QIC:  Sidekick

Date: 03/07/2020

PAX: Coldplay, Threeskin, Bubbles, FNG-Mr May, Snow Patrol, Schnitzel, Shot put, Pork Belly, 9 volt, El Chapo, FNG – Ferly, Mrs. Baker, Deep Dish, Clothespin, Biscuit Ring

AO: The Battery

Conditions

32 feels like 22, 12 mph wind

COP

SSH ICX20; One legged Bulgarians 10 each leg OYO; SLow Squats ICX15; Forward Fold ICX12; 3rd Grade Exercises ICX12; Will Mays Hays ICX12; Mosey to Tennis court

Burpee Suicide – Burpee on every line across the tennis court and the start line, normal suicide pattern

The Thang

Use that Hill

Not every AO has a hill so we need to make sure we use this one

Stolen Lions Den Traffic cone placed halfway up Hell hill.

10 Plank Jacks – Bear Crawl to Cone – 10 Mercans – Run to top – 20 LBC – Smurf Jacks ICX15 – back to bottom

10 Mountain CLimbers – Bear Crawl to Cone – 10 Mercans – Run to top – 20 BBSU – Smurf Jacks ICX15 – back to bottom

10 Mercans – Bear Crawl to Cone – 15 Mercans – Run to top – 20 Dying Cockraoches – Smurf Jacks ICX15 – back to bottom

Mosey to flat lot

Mini Doras

Track is about 50 yards down 50 yards back

Round 1 – 100 Hand release mercans

Round 2 – 400 Ray Lewis

Corn Squats in a circle

Circle up and hold plank – One guy squats 5 reps with corn – pass off to next guy – all the way around the circle

“Assisted” BBSU in a circle

Circle up – Everyone does BBSU to failure – Bag o Corn makes the rounds – do 5 BBSU with corn and pass it on to the next guy – All the way around the circle

Time

COT

Reflection. Looking back on where we have been and what we have become. F3 Chatt has grown tremendously and will continue to do so. We need to appreciate what we have in F3 Chattanooga. Do what you can to contribute to the growth and betterment of our community

Moleskin

We all hate smurf jacks. Bubbles with that beard and the hoodie on looked kind of like a garden gnome. Not my words but I can’t dispute them. Biscuit ring knows French, Schnitzel knows German and Russian. The Battery is like a UN meeting.

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    Burrito Almost Q’d at Hacksaw… ALMOST

    QIC:  Me/Someguy

    Date: 03/06/2020

    PAX: A bunch of Rough and Rowdy Men

    AO: Hacksaw

    Conditions

    Beautiful. Arrived with the hope of smelling freshly melted queso and salsa, but soon realized all I was going to smell was the broccoli I had last night for dinner.

    COP

    After waiting forever for our fearless leader to arrive, it was 5:30 A.M. and we were leaderless. Sensing the restlessness of the PAX, I took the reins. I presented two options: 1) AMRAP of eating tacos for 45 minutes OR 2) start a workout and lead these men to the promised land they so deserved. The PAX quickly reminded me that it wasn’t Tuesday, so Tacos were out of the question.

    The Thang

    Moseyed to the front of the library parking lot and called the first exercise. That’s right, the ole faithful Side Straddle Hop.

    Commanding the men LOUDLY (in case there were other men near our vicinity that could hear us and decide to join us):

    “NEXT EXERCISE, SIDE STRADDLE HOP” (“side straddle hop” echoed by the PAX)

    “STARTING POSITION, MOVE”

    “IN CADENCE” (“in cadence” echoed)

    “EXERCISE!”

    Made it through 10 reps before we were interrupted by someguy who reeked of moldy cheese and week old refried beans. He was insistent (maybe downright rude) on leading as Q for the rest of the workout. With the title of my favorite book in back of my mind (Freed to Lead), I obliged and stepped aside.

    I pretty much blacked out after that, but I do remember a lot of grabbing my six, holding hands, and eating Little Debbie snack cakes (#1 AO for a reason, even if we don’t have a hill)

    COT

    Always trust your instinct. If you are having dinner at your favorite Mexican restaurant and the server brings you a burrito (when you clearly ordered the chimichangas), don’t send it back. Simply get up and leave without saying a word. I promise, you will be better off. And besides, you are probably already full from 3 bowls of free chips and salsa.

    Moleskin

    Either from his lack of driving (surely he has a chauffeur) or lack of understanding how to approach a red light (I’m told Signal Mountain only has 1), Burrito decided to stop in the middle of the intersection.

    After mispronouncing the name of the girl at Chick-fil-A who politely asked if she could take his order, Burrito responded with “I’m not sure what I want to order, because I don’t know what you have.” NEWSFLASH: Chick-fil-A serves… chicken. I guess when you live on the second tallest mountain above the clouds, you’re too high to see what us lowland folk eat.

    I was told DNF was the heartthrob of Signal Mountain Middle School. My response was the obvious, “He’s the heartthrob of Hacksaw.”

    News

    Nah.

    WuzntMe: “Covid-19 can be sung at the same cadence and tune as Come on Eileen.”

    Truly one of the smartest men I know.

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      1,135 Burpees and We Didn’t Even Notice

      QIC:  Skitch

      Date: 3/5/2020

      PAX: Kowbell, Fissure, Uncle Fester, Doghouse, Chum, Back Pew, Lassie, Jaywalk, Goose

      AO: Hill City

      Conditions

      The night before there was a 65% of rain. When we awoke there was a 0% chance of rain. The second forecast was correct. 3 layers was too much.

      COP

      SSH x 40 IC, Forward Fold x 10 IC, Imperial Walkers x 15 IC, Willie Mays Hays x 10 IC, 5 burpees, 5 aquamen, 5 squats.

      Hiding the Burpees

      We moseyed to the big circle.
      ABS, SBA, BAS, BSA, ASB, SAB

      In 2 groups of 5, we worked our way around the big circle, sidewalk square by square. On each sidewalk square, a PAX did 5 Aquamen, 5 Squats, and/or 5 Burpees. You could do all 3 on one square or just one, but the square wasn’t complete until PAX jointly completed ABS, SBA, BAS, BSA, ASB, or SAB in chalk on the square indicating all the exercises had been completed. We completed the small circle on the stage as well. Mosey to the alley where 1’s wall sat while 2’s did 10 burpees; swap; rinse and repeat; rinse and repeat. Mosey back to parking lot for 10 more burpees, some low planks, and some big boy situps. Time.

      COT

      Ephesians 4:15-16 “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.” Whether it’s the 1 Million Burpee Challenge or giving an encouraging word, we daily have a small part to play to build up the body.

      BOM

      Moleskin

      It didn’t feel like 1,000+ burpees. Really.

      News

      Socks for 3rd F.

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        Tour de Elmo with Burpees

        QIC:  Skitch

        Date: 02/21/2020

        PAX: Candu, Pebbles

        AO: Boneyard

        Conditions

        I don’t think it was raining. But there was snow and ice on Lookout thereby trapping the mountain regulars from attending the beat down.

        COP

        Normal warm up exercises.

        The Thang

        We traveled.
        Tour de Elmo with Burpees

        We moseyed, lunged, and bear crawled to the Food City parking lot, out the entrance, around the backside of 1885 and to Clumpies. In between we did burpees, merkins, and wall sits. At Clumpies we did dips and incline merkins near the incline. On the way back with went up steps and on our hands and feet, shuffled a top the board walk. We did more burpees and lunges.

        COT

        Be faithful in the few things we control and trust God with all the things we do not. As I get older, the less I know (justified, true belief), but faith can fill the gap.
        BALL OF MAN.

        Moleskin

        Skitch gave the 1-minute warning to himself and the flag and thought he might start the workout alone. But he didn’t. We did 300 burpees. There was no snow or ice in the valley.

        News

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          To the Bridge! Everyone’s Doing It!!

          QIC:  Mr. Clean

          Date: 03/05/2020

          PAX: Band Camp, Ducktales, Geek Squad, Hasbro, Milkman, She Shed, Threeskin, U-Turn

          AO: The Huey

          Conditions

          “A really cold and wet 48” — She Shed

          COP

          Capri Lap

          The Thang

          YHC was asked if Dora was making an appearance. Maybe later. For now, we take two steps forward and one step back.
          Two Steps Forward and One Step Back
          Mosey two light pole forward — Complete 1 Squat
          Mosey one light pole backward — Complete 1 Burpee
          Rinse and Repeat. Increase Reps by One each time.

          Dora, Stations, Peanuts Exercise…(Nobody really ever knew, including the Q)
          At the Tuff Muff, Peanuts did this really cool routine in which each set of partners completed a Dora, those partners completed a minimum set reps, once the minimum was completed, the exercises continued until the Six completed their hundred.
          YHC tried his hand at this and well, two steps forward and one step back.

          –Merkins
          –Front Raises
          –Shoulder Presses
          –Curls
          –Dips
          The goal here: allow the Pax to choose the exercise (alleviated the issue of too few coupons and adding the opportunity to “modify upward”). Unfortunately, with multiple exercises going, it became very confusing as to when the Six was in. Audible.

          Dolly. 100 Reps (minimum) until Six arrived.

          Everyone’s Doing It!
          We completed suicide burpees until time.

          COT

          Before the COT began, we took a moment of silence for those affected by the tornadoes.

          In life, we get opportunities. Sometime that opportunity is to take two steps forward only to move a step backward. It’s ok. In the end, you still gained ground. Therefore, we have two choices: (1) focus on the step backward, or (2) focus on the fact WE. GAINED. GROUND. This morning, YHC had this happen during the Q. In the end, YHC focused on the hilarious nature of the Mumblechatter (see title), and frankly, in the end, HIM of F3 Chattanooga got a solid workout. Are you gaining ground or dwelling on the step backward? Are you taking care of yourself to take care of others?

          Moleskin

          JUMP OFF THE BRIDGE! EVERYONE’S DOING IT! — Threeskin featuring the artist known as Ducktales
          I knew Dora would be here at some point — multiple Paxers
          So, some guys are going to do like 300 and run 4 miles? Yes that’s correct Threeskin! TO THE BRIDGE!

          News

          Zack Attack Obstacle Course Race — See Ducktales
          Planning stages of 3rd Annual Fallen Five Memorial Event.
          https://f3chattanooga.wpcomstaging.com/schedule-locations/fallen-five/

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            Hacksaw Has No Hills; Therefore Terrible

            QIC:  WuzntMe

            Date: 3/4/2020

            PAX: Mayhem, Escobar, Meow Mix, Snow Patrol, John Doe, Jazzy Jag, Bernie, Fastlane, Vaccine, Clothespin

            AO: Hacksaw (Without Hills)

            Conditions

            Clear. Smooth like an ironing board.

            COP

            Mosey to the sheriff’s lot.

            20 SSH
            15 mountain climbers
            10 Teapots
            Downward Dog
            Upward Dog
            Third Grades

            The Thang

            Run to the not a hill .

            Since this isn’t a hill, it should be easy to Bearcrawl Boilermaker to the not a top.

            Once reaching the end of the street, which is somehow taller and at a significantly higher elevation than the rest of the vast plains of Hacksaw, indian run around the church.

            Go back down to the bottom of the hill.
            Partner up. One person bernies to the top. Other person does 5 BBS, 10 flutters, 15 mercuries, and 20 LBCs. Sprints to catch his partner up hill. Loser does 10 burpees, winner does LBCs until burpees finished. Swap chaser/pursuer, and do it again.

            COT

            There is no hill. Whatever obstacle you have, the bigger deal you make it, the more likely you are to lose. Don’t focus on the size of the problem, just conquer it.

            Moleskin

            John Doe is unimpressed with my mountain climbers.
            Pax really enjoyed the flat, boring, Kansas-like terrain of Hacksaw.

            News

            We need to support Battery with Qs and Pax for their impending Thursday launch. JD needs help with 3rd F.

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              The Chase is Better Than the Catch

              QIC:  WuzntMe

              Date: 03/02/2020

              PAX: Sidekick, Fastlane, Peanuts, Chavez, Lanyard, Swisher, Swingset, Best in Show, Mayhem, Sparky, Home Alone

              AO: Beast Ridge

              Conditions

              Raining.

              COP

              Mosey to the long lot, before Fastlane’s love shack.

              20 SSH
              Downward Dog
              15 SSH
              Upward Dog
              10 SSH
              World’s Greatest Stretch
              5 burpees

              The Thang

              In Slack, I had mentioned that this was going to be a Motorhead Monday. So, in keeping with that theme, we started with Bomber.
              11s, featuring Dive Bombers and Dips.

              Count off by twos
              Continuing on our theme, The Chase is Better Than the Catch

              Pax 1: 5 BBS, 10 flutter kicks, 15 Mercuries, 20 LBCs
              Pax 2: Bernie across the lot, until they reach the end.
              Pax 1 completes exercise, then chases after Pax 2. If Pax 2 can get to the end before Pax 1 tags them they win. Else, they lose. Loser does 10 burpees, while winner does LBCs until burpees completed.
              Rinse and repeat x4

              COT

              Lemmy is right. The Chase is Better Than the Catch. In life, we get so consumed with completing something, that we often lose interest after we catch it. We do this in work, with our marriages, and with our children. I challenge the PAX to enjoy the process, to enjoy the pursuit, but to not *stop* pursuing. Pursue your wives. Pursue being a better father. Pursue being a better employee. Pursue something you can never quite catch, and never get complacent.

              Moleskin

              My bluetooth speaker sucks. Motorhead wasn’t nearly loud enough for all to enjoy.

              News

              – 3rd F – Tomorrow / Meet at Chubby’s BBQ at 5:30PM. Serve until 8ish.
              – check Announcements channel

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                We Voted Today

                QIC:  Prosciutto and Burrito

                Date: 03/03/2020

                PAX: Burrito, Ducktales, Friar Tuck (Respect), Gusher, Holy Kiss

                AO: Smackdown

                Conditions

                mid-50’s and humid; rain held off so that we could do our cultish things

                Substi-Q this morning because our HIM Q had to tend to trauma at the hospital; Burrito and Prosciutto at the helm

                COP

                Burrito handled the warm-up in Whittler’s absence

                Ankle/knee-poppers (Willie Mays Hays)
                Cult Straddle Hops
                Cultish Night Clubs (Moroccan)
                Cult-Classic Ray Lewis
                Cult Fold (Forward)
                Cult Following – Easy lap around the quarter-mile track (which is almost a quarter mile; almost)

                The Thang

                In honour of Super Tuesday, the Pax were given a choice (nay, a ‘vote’) on option 1 or option 2. Adhering to democratic ways, all ballots were placed by show of hands for transparency’s sake … no paper ballots or re-counts necessary… As they say, “Democracy Rules”

                Democratic Burpicide
                Two end points set **roughly ~23 Yards apart; Dora with partners
                Pax A performs called exercise while….
                Pax B runs to the end point, Performs 1 burpee, back to start, Run to end point, 2 Burpees, back to start and run to end point once more for 3 burpees
                -Flapjack-
                100 – Merkins
                200 – LBC
                300 – Squats
                400 – SSH

                “The establishment of universal male suffrage in France in 1848 was an important milestone in the history of democracy. “
                Thank you France
                The Pax were spent from the Democratic Burpicide. As we made our way moseying to the bleachers from the track, we had to have 3 10-counts. So, we had to make up for it. Because Democracy.
                French Dips x 5 / man IC x 2 rounds
                Raccoon walk down and back
                Toe Merkins x 10 or 12 (?) IC
                French Dips x 5 / man IC x 1 round

                _1.25 Minutes of Mary_

                COT

                Scott Simmons provided a nice summary of his time spent reading Exodus to his daughters.

                Mental Health Awareness day coming up March 27th. Be a shining light, a positive example and a pillar of suport to another man (Shield Lock); you may or may not know what they’re dealing with – you might be their only saving grace.

                Moleskin

                • Ducktales met YHC at home to catch a ride to startex from his 4:30am Ruck. This was unplanned. Was he waiting on me? Was he spying? Was he fertilizing my yard? My neighbors yard? Yes. to all these things.
                • When you make your own cd’s, they’re like moments frozen in time that pay dividends at a later time; Thank you “Rap 2” and Jay-Z
                • David Copperfield apparently used Burrito in his performance once. Even he could not make him disappear.
                • Speaking of Las Vegas, there are naked women there.
                • **Ask Friar Tuck about the distance between two points. It’s likely he’s pretty spot-on with distance, wind speed/direction and barometric pressure. And he’ll aim at you if you bad mouth Ole Miss.
                • We need to give Raccoons more respect than they get for the way they walk.

                News

                It’s raining cats and dogs.

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                  Clothespin’s Rainy Core Day

                  QIC:  Clothespin

                  Date: 03/03/2020

                  PAX: Mrs Baker, Deep Dish, ElChapo

                  AO: The Battery

                  Conditions

                  Wet thunder off in the distance

                  Mother nature played games with my plans this morning and didn’t send the rain.

                  COP

                  • Mosey around Greenway to Parking Area
                  • Third Grade Exercise 15 in cadence
                  • SSH 20 in cadence
                  • Willy Mayse Hayse 14 in cadence
                  • Little baby Arm circles forward (thumb up) 15 in cadence
                  • Little baby Arm circles reverse (thumb down) 15 in cadence
                  • Cherry Pickers 15 in cadence
                  • Moroccan Night Club
                  • Seal claps 10 in cadence

                  The Thang

                  30 seconds each exercise more of a core emphasis.:
                  • Imperial Walkers
                  • HI Plank
                  • Burpees
                  • Side Plank
                  • Slow Squats
                  • Other side Plank
                  • LBC
                  • Low Plank
                  • High Knees
                  • Hold Crab walk position (hip Bridge)
                  • Merkins
                  • 10 Count
                  • Curls
                  • HI Plank
                  • Burpees
                  • Side Plank
                  • Overhead Press
                  • Other side Plank
                  • Big Boy Sit-ups
                  • Low Plank
                  • Dips
                  • Hold Crab walk position (hip Bridge)
                  • Triceps Extensions
                  • 10 Count
                  • Take a lap
                  We went through each exercise three times before the stretch

                  Stretch:
                  Forward Fold
                  Downward Dog
                  Upward Dog

                  COT


                  [The “COT” aka the “CIRCLE OF TRUST” is the terminating stage of each Workout, wherein the PAX form a circle and conduct Counterama, Namerama, Announcearama and the Ball Of Man.
                  BALL OF MAN: Congregation of two or more men in physical contact, usually (but not exclusively) in the prayer that terminates the COT. Abbr: BOM]

                  News

                  [Fill in News, Upcoming Q’s, Events, etc.]

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                    Slippin’ and a Slidin’

                    Date: 03/03/2020

                    PAX: The Count, She Shed, Skitch, Back Pew, Sunshine, Pink Panther, Hobo, Ramos, Cow Bell, Early Bird, Red Tees, Free Time

                    AO: Hill City

                    QIC: Goose

                    Conditions: Wet


                    COP

                    SSH x 20

                    Fwd Fold x OYO

                    Willie Mays Hays x 20

                    Quad Stetch each leg OYO

                    Cherry Pickers x 20

                    Moroccan Night Club x20

                    SSH x20


                    The Thang

                    Adora: Mosey to end of light poles and back while partner does: 200 merkins, 200 squats, 200 LBCs

                    Mosey to field by blue rhino, and lunge to sidewalk and back

                    Start at Blue Rhino, mosey to Frazier ave, 25 merkins or squats at every light pole.