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If BURPEES Are Your MO (Smackdown – 03/10)

QIC:  John Doe

Date: 03/10/2020

PAX: Burrito, Ducktales, Friar Tuck (Respect), FreeTime, Gusher, Hambone, Laces Out (Respect), Pediasure, Prosciutto, Recycle, Whittler

AO: Smackdown

Conditions

Pleasantly warm day on top of the mountain, with some fairly steady drizzle and a little bit of wind

COP

Mosey around the track; SSH (IC) – 25; Forward Fold (IC) -10; Third Grade Exercises (IC) -10; Willie Mays Hays (IC) – 10; SSH (IC) – 25

The Thang

[Comments]
Mountain Climb the Apocalypse
Lined up across the width of the field and did a version of Burpee Apocalypse:

1 min of Mtn Climbers – Sprint 50yds – 10 Burpees – Jog back 50yds

1 min Mtn Climbers – Sprint 50yds – 9 Burpees – Jog back 50yds

1 Min Mtn Climbers – Sprint 50 yds – 8 Burpees – Jog back 50yds

….Continue this pattern until the last set is….

1 Min Mtn Climbers – Sprint 50yds – 1 Burpee – Jog back 50 yds

Had Stations set up from there:

Station 1 – Air Squats (1 minute)

Station 2 – Side Straddle Hops (1 minute)

Station 3 – Apolo Ohnos (1 minute)

Station 4 – Bonnie Blairs (1 minute)

Station 5 – Toe Merkins (1 Minute)

Closed with Duck, Duck…Burpee/Merkin/LBC/100s (Details Below)

Circled up with one member of the PAX running around the circle while the rest of the PAX did the following exercise:

Burpees (while 6 members of PAX took turns running the circle)

Merkins (while 6 members of PAX took turns running the circle)

LBC (while 6 members of PAX took turns running the circle)

100s (while 6 members of PAX took Turns running the circle)

COT

QIC talked about humility and how he often falls on the side of arrogance. Shared the below affirmation and Bible verse. Challenged the PAX to be humble this week and to look at others with compassion and not a sense of arrogance or entilement

A mistake that makes you humble is much better than an achievement that makes you arrogant.

The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.
Proverbs 22:4


BALL OF MAN: Burrito closed us in Prayer

Moleskin

Burrito has channeled his inner grunting somewhat; A lot of Tales from a certain Duck – not sure he pushed himself to his limits there. Proscuitto is Awesome and committed to signing up for a Chubby’s Q in April. Common question: “Who is John Doe?” similar to “Who is John Gault”, I’ll let y’all decide

News

3rdF @ Chubby’s – sign up for a Q in April

Zach Attack Mud Run this Saturday (3/14/20)

Burrito on Q Next

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    Freedom Bird

    QIC:  Fissure

    Date: 03/12/2020

    PAX: Friar Tuck, Couch Potato, Threeskin, Geek Squad, Bandcamp, Milkman, U-turn, Ducktales

    AO: The Huey

    Conditions

    Upper 50s. Ground wet. Humidity beginning to roll in.

    COP

    Mosey from flag around track over to back lot
    Circle up
    SSH x 10 IC
    Imperial Walker x 10 IC
    SSH x 10 IC
    Fwd Fold x 10 IC
    WMH x 10 IC
    SSH x 10 IC
    Teapots x 9 each side IC
    SSH x 10 IC
    Iraqi tea time x 10 IC
    SSH x 10 IC

    The Thang

    “Killer B’s”

    3 Rounds:
    Broad jump 10 yards
    10 burpees, 10 Bonnie Blairs, 10 big boi situps
    Broad Jump 10 yards
    10 burpees, 10 Bonnie Blairs, 10 big boi situps
    Broad Jump 10 yards
    10 burpees, 10 Bonnie Blairs, 10 big boi situps
    Bear crawl back to start 30 yards
    While waiting for 6: hold plank to failure, 10 big boi situps, run lap

    1 Round:
    Broad jump 10 yards
    5 burpees, 5 Bonnie Blairs, 5 big boi situps
    Broad Jump 10 yards
    15 burpees, 15 Bonnie Blairs, 15 big boi situps
    Broad Jump 10 yards
    20 burpees, 20 Bonnie Blairs, 20 big boi situps
    Bear crawl back to start 30 yards
    While waiting for 6: hold plank to failure, 10 big boi situps, run lap

    Mosey back to flag

    COT

    Briefly touched on the corona virus craze that is currently in full swing. No touchy.

    Encouraged the pax to embrace whetstone and seek out Iron Butt’s guidance. F3 is built to foster mentor/mentee relationships.

    Moleskin

    An older gentleman pulled up to get some laps in. He was kind enough to light a heater for our lungs to enjoy

    Couch referred to THE huey as a Freedom Bird on our way back to the flag. What a great symbol she is.

    News

    [Fill in News, Upcoming Q’s, Events, etc.]

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      My daughter turned 5 yesterday. She can count higher than Holy Kiss.

      QIC:  Burrito

      Date: 03/12/2020

      PAX: Prosciutto, Whittler, PediaSure, Holy Kiss, Gusher, Laces Out, Recycle

      AO: SmackDown

      Conditions

      Delightfully pleasant, until the monsoon that hit precisely at 6:10 a.m.

      COP

      1. Mosey x 400

      2. 21 (with burpee penalty)

      3. Willie Mays Hayes

      4. Forward Fold

      5. 20 Merkins (OYO)

      6. Little Baby Arm Circles (not to be confused with “Baby Arm Circles”)

      7. Little Moroccan Nightclubs

      8. Little Ray Lewis

      9. 21 (with another burpee penalty, because Holy Kiss is the only idiot on Signal Mountain who doesn’t know how to count to 21).

      The Thang

      Divide into teams of four (4). One member of each team goes to goalpost. Another member of each team goes to opposite goalpost. Two remaining members of each team start on goal line as runners.

      On my “go,” it’s a relay, with the guys at each goalpost doing exercising, then being “tagged out” by the runners.

      Round 1 (each team member runs 3 220s (down and back). Exercises on Goalposts: (1) Coupon Curls; (2) Merkins.

      Round 2 — exercises: (1) Coupon Rows; (2) LBCs.

      Then, to the Wall of Pain.

      Round 1: Pass the Coupon down the row and back as each PAX sits on the wall.

      Round 2: Pass the Coupon down the row. After each pass, the passer does 5 Merkins.

      Finale: in a circle on the field, each PAX does two (2) John McCains with the Coupon as the other PAX hold plank.

      COT

      This COVID-19 stuff is bananas, but the Psalmist states that we have no fear because our trust is in the Lord (Psalm 27:1-3).

      Moleskin

      I don’t really like any of these guys. To wit:

      1. Whittler is, generically, mean. I bet his bedside manner is the best. He didn’t even stick around for the COT.

      2. Prosciutto thinks he invented the Upright Row, and his gold chain blinds me early in the morning.

      3. Laces Out thinks Memphis is better than UT, and also tried to make me believe that he was involved in a true kicking rivalry. A KICKING RIVALRY! That’s like saying Vanderbilt and Northwestern have a football rivalry.

      4. Gusher criticizes and text shames me because I typically don’t do Backblasts. I’m going to heckle him during his next sermon.

      5. PediaSure is a doctor, but can’t even answer all of my questions about the Coronavirus.

      6. Holy Kiss can’t count, and makes us all look stupid.

      7. Recycle is okay — he’s only been out there a week, so I haven’t found a reason to hate him yet. I’m sure I’ll find something soon.

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        Lungin’ Around

        QIC:  Goose

        Date: 03/11/2020

        PAX: Moneyball, Payload, Back Pew, Burrito, Mr. Clean, Geek Squad, Milkman, Footloose, Roomba, Square Root, Friar Tuck, Teflon, Oil Can, Mendoza, Cooter

        AO: The Landfill

        The Thang

        Do a lap, up and down staircases at both bleachers

        Lunge down and back length of field

        Bear crawl, sideline to sideline down and back

        Merkinsx25 Squatsx25, LBCsx25, with lap in between each

        100 reps, fielders choice, OYO

        Jailbreaks x6

        Mary: 50 LBCS

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        The Saddest Howling

        QIC:  Escobar

        Date: 03/11/2020

        PAX:  Mayhem, Clothespin, Pebbles, Peanuts, Meow Mix, Snow Patrol, Swipe Right, Vaccine, Bernie, Toe Tag, Threeskin, 

        AO: Hacksaw

        Conditions

        Wet, but no rain. Foggy, but we could still see the 95.1% full moon shining down on us. 60 degrees means summer is almost here.

        COP

        Moseyed from parking lot to flag and grabbed a block on the way.

        • SSH x 25
        • Honeycutts 10 each arm
        • Teapots x 10 total
        • Toe Taps on block x 20
        • WMH x 10
        • Forward Fold x 10
        • SSH x 15

        The Thang

        BLOCK WORK- PAX circled around flag at edge of concrete:

        10 Manmakers followed by walking lunge to flag pole, reverse lunge back to edge of circle, bear crawl to flag pole, crawl bear back. HOLD PLANK TILL 6 IS DONE.

        10 McCains followed by same lunge/crawl routine.

        40 Curls followed by same routinte.

        20 Lightning Bolts (10 each leg) followed by same routine.

        CORE TIME:

        • Not-So Lazy Boys (~1 minute total time)
        • Windshield Wipers x 10
        • Low Plank x 1 minute
        • 1 Round of Jackie Chans (30 seconds each: Hammer, Leg Raise, LBC, Heel Touch, Crunchy Frog, 100s)

        HOWLING TIME MORE LIKE GRUNTING TIME:

        Howling Monkeys x 2 rounds (10 reps each round for each PAX)

        FINISH LINE:

        The Cooper- 10 Burpees, 10 Squats, 10 Merkins, Run a lap. Decrease Reps by 1 after each run. 9,9,9, 8,8,8, etc. until time was called.

        COT

        Talked about completing the Chattanooga Marathon Relay this past weekend with Toe Tag, WuzntMe, and John Doe. Initially I had no desire to participate in this event, but I decided to push myself and commit to the team/event. It was a rewarding experience and I was thankful I changed by initial decision. Encouraged the PAX to step out and commit to doing something they may not have a desire to complete, but something they know will make them better. Sign up for a 5k, 10k, bike race, ANYTHING. Come join us for the 5k at 5a for a few weeks and see how much your fitness improves. Take that step and make a move.

        Moleskin

        There was only 1 howl (if you can call it that) during the howling monkey routine. Most of the noise was grunting. Although no one channeled their inner mutant coyote, the timing of the routine was perfect having a young female running the circle around the flags witnessing this manly display. Only thing missing was 9Volt’s Flag/Eagle Crotch underwear.

        News

        Battery will soon be T/Th/S. Ridgecut will soon be the most desirable AO on W/F (you should see the size of their…)

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          Thieving Bob’s Thang

          QIC:  Fissure

          Date: 03/09/2020

          PAX: Peanuts, Sunburn, Candu, FNG-Gosling, Jazzy Jag, Sidekick, Pebbles, Iron Butt, Teflon, Best In Show

          AO: Boneyard

          Conditions

          Upper 50’s and drizzling

          COP

          Mosey to the Incline parking lot with a pit stop to crank out 40 merkins for heart health
          SSH x 25 IC
          Imperial Walkers x 10 IC
          SSH x 20 IC
          WMH x 10 IC
          SSH x 15 IC
          Fwd Fold x 10 IC
          SSH x 10 IC
          Arm circles, reverse, seal claps x 10 IC
          SSH x 20 IC

          The Thang

          Just to get a lay of the land:
          Lunge up Incline parking lot ~75 yards
          Lunge down Incline parking lot ~75 yards

          Starting at the bottom perform 1 burpee then run to the top, 5 LBCs then run back down
          Continue back and forth with LBC reps increasing by 5 as burpee reps increase by 1.
          Done after the round of 8 burpees and 40 LBCs.
          Yes, Robert Jean aka Whittler aka Bob q’d Huey yesterday and did this same burpee/LBC thang (and 40 merkins for heart health). Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Right?

          20 burpees then jailbreak to the top

          Mosey back to startex
          SSH x 25 IC
          Plank x 30 IC
          10 burpees

          COT

          Encouraged the pax to embrace whetstone and seek out Iron Butt’s guidance. F3 is built to foster mentor/mentee relationships.

          Moleskin

          Peanuts showed up late and found an empty parking lot. He should get a q credit for sticking around until we returned.

          We got a glimpse of the new Incline railway cars. Pretty kewl.

          FNG naming was a bit like pulling teeth. Kenny didn’t seem to have many stories to share even when pressed on how he proposed to his wife, so we envisioned a scene out of the Notebook with Ryan Gosling, etc etc

          News

          Battlefield (North Georgia AO to be launched soon) Saturdays 0600-0700

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            Goosin’ Around

            QIC:  Goose

            Date: 03/07/2020

            PAX: Fissure, Fly by, Chum, FNG-Flop, Money Ball, Belly Roll, Candu, Rocket Man

            AO: The Landfill

            Conditions

            Sunny Skies, Chilly

            COP

            SSH x25

            Willie Mays Hays x10

            Forward Fold OYO

            Windmill x15

            Quad Stretch OYO

            Third Grade Exercises x10

            SSH x25

            The Thang

            Bernie Sanders up hill with rock x3

            5 exercises of your choice at every light post up to pavillion

            Lunge down and back across field

            Jailbreaks

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              Trill speak

              QIC:  Whittler

              Date: 03/09/2020

              PAX: Hasbro, U-turn, Threeskin, Fissure, Mr. Clean, Geek Squad, Radiohead, Cable cutter, Band Camp, Lugnut

              AO: The Huey

              Conditions

              Cooler than expected and remarkably quiet

              COP

              Warm up lap with a stop for 40 merkins then wind up in the back parking lot

              Windmill x 10

              Third grade x 10

              Willie mays Hays x 10

              Calf stretch x 10

              SSH x 20

              Arm circles x 10

              Seal clap x 10

              Randy x 10

              Plank x 15

              Plank Jack x 10

              Shoulder taps x 10

              SSH x 25

              Imperial Walkers x 15

              The Thang


              Case of the Mondays
              Start at one median with 1 rep, then run to the other side and do 5 reps of another exercise and run back. Do this for 8 rounds, increasing reps by 1 and 5 respectively.

              Burpee x 1, LBC x 5

              Burpee x2, LBC x 10

              Etc until Burpee x 8 and LBC x 40

              Lunge walk suicides with squats every other line x 10 lines

              Mosey to pavilion

              Dips x 10

              Thrusters x 10

              Incline merkins x 10

              Decline Merkins x 10

              Lunge walk back to lot

              Mary

              Pickle Rounder circle x 4 rounds

              Freddie Mercury x 10

              Pretzel x 10

              Heel touch x 10

              COT

              Significance

              This word means different things to different people. How do you define significance for your life? We often seek significance in the wrong thing such as fame, possessions, money, worldly accomplishments, power, etc. These are all fleeting things. At the day of the day, we shouldn’t define significance by what we have or what we have accomplished. My goal is to define my significance based on my relationship with Christ. I’m not perfect and I haven’t yet achieved that but my goal every day is to give up the rat race and find my significance in the love I have for Jesus Christ.

              Moleskin

              Hasbro was injured but powered through. T claps

              It was very quiet without Burrito and Ducktales there

              There was some trill work done

              Duck showed up at the end with coffee despite his hamburger feet and me failing to come through on a Kenyan foot transplant

              News

              Zack Attack this Saturday – see Duck for deets

              3rd F tomorrow – give your new socks to Fissure

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                Super Tuesday (on a Thursday)

                QIC:  Whittler

                Date: 03/05/2020

                PAX: Gusher, The Count, Prosciutto, Blindside, Sidekick, Pediasure, FNG-Recycle, FNG-Hambone, Laces Out, Burrito, Sally, Gecko, Friar Tuck

                AO: Smackdown

                Conditions

                Pleasant

                COP

                Plank Jack

                Mountain Climber

                Arm Circles

                Seal claps

                Randys

                3rd grade exercises

                Willie Mays Hays

                The Thang

                Originally intended for Super Tuesday (thus the political themes)
                Dirty MacDeuce
                We had a playlist with more than 2 songs and each time “Cotton Eye Joe” played, we were to stop and do the Cotton Eye Joe for 3 minutes and 14 seconds

                Round 1

                Wide Merkin x 12 (4 count)

                Iron Mike (Bloomberg) x 12

                (Elizabeth) War(ren) Hammers x 12

                Run across field and Bernie Sanders back after 3 exercises were done. Rinse and repeat for 4 rounds total

                Round 2 – Choose a Running Mate

                Running mate Merkins x 12

                Victory jump squats x 12

                Big boy situp slaps x 12

                Run across field and Bernie back after each of the 3 exercises for 4 rounds total

                Mary

                Alphabet Circle

                Pickle pointer circle

                COT

                “Fundamentally, therefore, any man can, even under such circumstances, decide what shall become of him, both mentally and spiritually.” Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

                Our spiritual freedom is what makes life meaningful and purposeful. It’s the one thing that can’t be taken from us. This was written by a Jewish psychiatrist while imprisoned in a concentration camp. Despite living in deplorable conditions, the man chose how to respond to this hardship: he chose his path because no one could take away his spiritual freedom.

                Moleskin

                The peanut gallery decided they didn’t enjoy my monotonous delivery and personality. To each their own.

                News

                3rd F on Tuesdays

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                  lil bit o dis lil bit o dat

                  QIC:  Sidekick

                  Date: 03/07/2020

                  PAX: Coldplay, Threeskin, Bubbles, FNG-Mr May, Snow Patrol, Schnitzel, Shot put, Pork Belly, 9 volt, El Chapo, FNG – Ferly, Mrs. Baker, Deep Dish, Clothespin, Biscuit Ring

                  AO: The Battery

                  Conditions

                  32 feels like 22, 12 mph wind

                  COP

                  SSH ICX20; One legged Bulgarians 10 each leg OYO; SLow Squats ICX15; Forward Fold ICX12; 3rd Grade Exercises ICX12; Will Mays Hays ICX12; Mosey to Tennis court

                  Burpee Suicide – Burpee on every line across the tennis court and the start line, normal suicide pattern

                  The Thang

                  Use that Hill

                  Not every AO has a hill so we need to make sure we use this one

                  Stolen Lions Den Traffic cone placed halfway up Hell hill.

                  10 Plank Jacks – Bear Crawl to Cone – 10 Mercans – Run to top – 20 LBC – Smurf Jacks ICX15 – back to bottom

                  10 Mountain CLimbers – Bear Crawl to Cone – 10 Mercans – Run to top – 20 BBSU – Smurf Jacks ICX15 – back to bottom

                  10 Mercans – Bear Crawl to Cone – 15 Mercans – Run to top – 20 Dying Cockraoches – Smurf Jacks ICX15 – back to bottom

                  Mosey to flat lot

                  Mini Doras

                  Track is about 50 yards down 50 yards back

                  Round 1 – 100 Hand release mercans

                  Round 2 – 400 Ray Lewis

                  Corn Squats in a circle

                  Circle up and hold plank – One guy squats 5 reps with corn – pass off to next guy – all the way around the circle

                  “Assisted” BBSU in a circle

                  Circle up – Everyone does BBSU to failure – Bag o Corn makes the rounds – do 5 BBSU with corn and pass it on to the next guy – All the way around the circle

                  Time

                  COT

                  Reflection. Looking back on where we have been and what we have become. F3 Chatt has grown tremendously and will continue to do so. We need to appreciate what we have in F3 Chattanooga. Do what you can to contribute to the growth and betterment of our community

                  Moleskin

                  We all hate smurf jacks. Bubbles with that beard and the hoodie on looked kind of like a garden gnome. Not my words but I can’t dispute them. Biscuit ring knows French, Schnitzel knows German and Russian. The Battery is like a UN meeting.

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